she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Randomize
