shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
