we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize