if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
