It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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