She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
