Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
