I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
