You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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