my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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