is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
