I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize