Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I looked at my own cervix.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
