it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
