I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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