hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
