why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
