omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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