i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
