Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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