we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
