Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
