I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
