just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
