Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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