it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Randomize
