at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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