Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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