I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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