Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
