This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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