I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
