He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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