Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
are you so shy because you have an std?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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