i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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