brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
