id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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