is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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