I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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