Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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