So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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