don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
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