Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
