im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
