Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize