Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
