anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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