guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize