At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
There's always time for handjobs
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I don't deserve a penis
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
