I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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