i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
