she woke up with a sticky ear
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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