I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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