Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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