so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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